Dave is a freelance writer; with articles on music, motorbikes, football, pop-science, vaping and tobacco harm reduction in Sounds, Melody Maker, UBG, AWoL, Bike, When Saturday Comes, Vape News Magazine, and syndicated across the Johnston Press group. He was published in an anthology of “Greatest Football Writing”, but still believes this was a mistake. Dave contributes sketches to comedy shows and used to co-host a radio sketch show. He’s worked with numerous independent vape companies to develop content for their websites.
He holds certificates in physics, education, business, marketing, and fine art – he’s clever like that, he has learnt to hold many things but prefers the lighter ones. Dave rose from collecting unmentionable stuff from toilet floors in McDonalds to become an apologist for a loathed chemical company. He walked out to become a playground child herder, and teaching is the most rewarding thing he’s done.
He lived in a Colombian war zone and through civil insurrection in Venezuela, but neither of them compared to the mean streets of Southend or Sunderland. He returned to the UK to raise his children and spaniels in a little East Midlands village, where the local shop keeps him stocked with gin – although Papa John’s has blacklisted him.
Dave prefers spending time with spanners in his garage, and thinks music should be played loud or turned off. If there is a heaven then he hopes it’s a big field full of tequila, seafood pizza, pandas and otters. It’s distinctly possible he hasn’t thought this through sufficiently. He collects karate belts and “no” he won’t demonstrate it in a pub beer garden. Dave’s installation artwork is still to be recognised as worth using to cover unsightly wall stains.
Surgeon General of the United States Jerome Adams believes Dave is a “bot”. He is still thinking of a comeback that isn’t “…just what a bot would say.”