Shitty Wednesday Giveaway

[burnt fingers]

Sounds like a job for a knight of the relm

 

[vapemac]

Always gets a giggle.

Or

@Leni is this how your pigeon problem goes down at work?

 

[jsixtysix]

 

[fasteddy]

This always makes me chuckle

 

[Snakebitex10]

When a girl seductively tells you, “You can stick it wherever you want.”

Apparently in her sister is NOT one of the options.

 

[tony68]

Well I bought a postbox its like a big metal box you screw to the wall for all your letters to go in. Bought it because my letterbox was so tight and springy that the postman could not push the letters through without cutting their fingers off. Anyhoo I got one bolted it to the wall and was ready to go. Then the problem I lost the keys to open the box to get my mail out. So contacted the company to send out some more keys so I could open it . They fucking posted them.

I posted this a while back on a different thread but its a true story.
PS not an entry.
Good fun give away.

 

[ashf1983]

Here's a nice tranquil picture to lift your mood Dave [emoji108]
#notanentry

 

[crustyfolker]

many moons ago 5 of us where in a car which ran out of petrol, 3 of us went and got some petrol in a jerry can returned and the petrol was put in. My brother was driving and he attempts to start the car but to no avail. His best mate in the passenger seat and a comedian in his own right decides the road is flat enough to push the car by himself from the passenger side with the door open not from the back. Now the lad has a pair of flat bottom brogues on so he starts pushing. the rest of us idle and the worse for weather through narcotics where in the car by the way, and it is starting to roll along with the lad pushing, he then slips because of the shoes, we hear a double clap as his hands hit the floor, the car feels like its rolled over one of those speed bumps just as the music makes a bass sound booom and everything goes silent. oh my god he must of been crushed what if he's dead etc etc. All of a sudden the lad seems to appear from nowhere jumping around screaming "oh my arse, oh my arse you've squashed all the fat to one side of my arse". what happened was the back wheel some how rode over his arse cheeks as he fell . I laughed and laughed all night at this and more so every time he turned round to speak to us in the back the rest of the night. 2 weeks later i was still suffering from stomach aches through laughing so much, it's something i will never forget and still gets spoke about oh and you should have seen the bruising he had

 

[ZendeR]

Fanny Chmelar... Gets me everytime! #notanentry

 

[Sprite71]

#Notanentry

If I read enough of these, it gets me every time ... the cumulative effect